am only blogging now at this unearthly hour because i am online downloading stuff... taking damn long to do so but well gotta finish it. if parents catch me here right now? i will be completely screwed. yes.
sorry pple, if you've been checking my blog and seeing nothing. no mood, no time, no energy. just doesnt appeal to me to come to my blog and type nowadays. these few days i just keep my feelings inside. even my private blog has been temporarily abandoned. dont know whats up with me. i used to be such a blog enthusiast. everything i will blog. now... even the most important things, i think about blogging, then when i get to the comp i completely dont.
well anyway, today was alright, pretty fun. we did a recording and all that, i really wld enjoy recording songs. it wld be like, a dream come true. haha. all my bathroom practice would pay off, i hope.
dunno. right now at this moment feeling quite down. maybe very tired. but just a little men4 men4 bu4 le4... sigh. i think i know why, but shant say it here lah, lest the person reads it and i prob will hear no end to it. not that i really care but seriously i have no energy to play the game in which someone always thinks he is just so right and so smart... well im sorry that you think only you know best and that you can come around and tell people that they are in the wrong, and im sorry that im not as learned in this certain area so i dont really know what i can do, and too bad that despite me trying all the ways i know to do something, you think its not good enough for you and you come and tell me so. as though i just sat on my ass and and wished for magic.
anyway, almost done downloading, i hope.
sigh. its already may. i so wish it wasnt. the days pass just like that, and i remain aware yet unaware. many things have happened since we left school... changes, like we grew up, our daily timetables changed drastically, friends lost, for some of us, new school already, for others like me, going thru all the tiresome procedures and awaiting entry into poly, with feelings like dreadful anticipation... its all sickening.
haiz i dunno lah. i just want life to be good. whatever good means. just, for once, good. but thats just wishful thinking. even now when i havent started school yet, problems are piling up like debris of a fallen building... lots of things weigh on my mind, or at least, a few problems that are big enough to be a burden, and the few that my peers do not understand because they dont have those problems and never did.
well......
i dont really know what to say anymore. everything sounds stupid to say at this point in time... guess i'll just end here and leave the vagueness hanging without an explanation.
oh before i forget, please do not message or call me on my hp from 9-14 may (for 9th, after 230pm dont sms liao, for 14th, before midnight dont sms). will not be in singapore. unless urgent then, but i dont think you all will have anything that urgent to need to reach me also.
k. goodnight world. or rather, good morning. what sux is that i am supposed to be up at 8am this morning for (yet another game of) badminton. everyday play until damn sianz.
right. ciao.